Screen Time Request Not Received? What Parents Should Check

If a Screen Time request is not received, check Messages, the family account setup and the type of request before changing the child’s restrictions. A request for extra time is different from permission to download an app, make a purchase or access restricted content. Identify which one is missing so you check the right controls.

Start with the parent’s device and the child’s device together if possible. Note the wording on the child’s screen and whether the request appears anywhere on the parent’s devices. Do not delete the family group or switch off parental controls just to make an alert appear.

Identify the Request

• More time: the child has reached a time allowance or a scheduled restriction.
• Ask to Buy: the child wants an eligible app download or purchase.
• An exception or other permission: the child needs access that a content, website or communication control restricts.

Apple’s guide to approving children’s requests covers responses in Messages and approval in person. Read the request itself rather than treating every parental-control notification as an extra-time request.

Check the Parent and Child Accounts

Confirm that the child appears in your Family Sharing group and uses their own Apple Account. Check that you are the organiser or a designated parent or guardian who can manage the relevant requests. An adult membership alone is not the same as being assigned a parental role.

Check the account on the device you expect to receive the request. If another parent normally approves it, ask whether it appeared there. Avoid changing account sign-ins until you have identified an actual mismatch.

Look in Messages and Check Delivery Settings

1. Open Messages directly on your iPhone, iPad or Mac. A missing alert does not necessarily mean the request itself is missing.
2. Check Messages notifications and whether a Focus mode is hiding alerts.
3. For exception requests, check that iMessage can send and receive using your Apple Account email address.
4. Check that your iCloud contacts are available on the receiving device and that the parent or organiser is in the child’s contacts.

For app exception requests, Apple also specifies recent iMessage use: messages must have been sent and received through iMessage within the last 30 days. This is a requirement in Apple’s exception-request troubleshooting guidance; it is not a reason to assume every Screen Time problem has the same cause.

Check Updates Without Mixing Menu Versions

Both devices need a working connection to exchange requests. Check for current compatible updates, restart if needed, then test one fresh request. Record whether it appears in Messages even if no banner notification appears.

The redesigned version-27 family controls require a coordinated family-device update and an upgrade of the parental controls. Families with older devices may still use the previous interface. Follow Apple’s family update guidance rather than assuming one updated phone changes every family setting.

If the Missing Request Is Ask to Buy

Check that approval is required for the child’s eligible purchases and downloads. Apple’s Ask to Buy documentation also lists situations that do not trigger another request, including an update or a redownload of the child’s own purchase.

Do not use an already-owned app as your only test of purchase approval. Choose an appropriate new download and stop before authorising any paid purchase you do not intend to make. If an Ask to Buy request was dismissed or not approved within its validity period, ask the child to send a fresh one.

If Approval Arrives but the App Still Cannot Be Used

First check what was approved. Permission to download an app does not necessarily grant extra usage time, remove a separate content restriction or allow every feature inside that app.

Open the child’s settings and inspect the relevant app rule, current time allowance and schedule. Make one change only if it matches the permission you intended to grant. Do not broadly allow all apps to solve a problem affecting one school app.

If you approved extra time for the correct app but access still fails, record the approval duration and the exact blocked message. That is an enforcement problem to investigate, rather than merely a missing notification.

Use In-Person Approval When Appropriate

For a supported extra-time request, the child can use the option to request approval on their own device. Enter the Screen Time passcode yourself and choose the intended duration. Purchase or app-exception approval may use Apple Account authentication instead; follow the prompt for that request type.

Keep the passcode and account password private. In-person approval is a temporary way to handle a legitimate request, not proof that remote delivery has been repaired.

What to Send Apple Support

If the same request repeatedly fails, provide the request type, both devices’ software versions, family roles and whether ordinary iMessage works. Include whether the request appears on any other parent device and the result of a fresh test. Redact account addresses and private conversations from screenshots unless official support specifically needs them.

Avoid promises that a reset or software update will fix every request. The useful outcome is reliable approval delivery and the intended restriction staying in place afterwards.

If you are considering additional controls, our parental-control app comparison explains options by family need. A missed request or a settings problem alone is not a reason to buy another app.

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